One For The Guys: Locking Down The Proposal

Tradition has it that the guy is the proposer and the lady is the proposee. Fast-forward to 2016 and you have all kinds of awesome proposals in all kinds of relationships. Yay! At Noir, we’re all about breaking out of the box and breaking the rules, but we definitely appreciate tradition, too. We just love love. It’s as simple as that.

Growing up with three brothers, I like to think I have a little edge on the perspective of the guy in most situations. Sometimes I’m proved very wrong, other times it’s comical how spot on I am. But in the end, it’s not really something I’d place a bet on, ya know?

Here’s what I would bet on, though. I bet any guy proposing knows his girlfriend pretty well. This actually is kind of a pre-req for the proposal. Since you’re best buds, you probably want to make this awesome. Here’s the How-To, in three easy steps:

(Hint: If you need help beyond this, Noir offers a proposal planning package. Check it.)

Put a little thought into it.

Or don’t. Impromptu proposals are cool, too. If anything, try to think about what will surprise her, what will make her happy, and what will make her comfortable. 

Pick out + purchase the ring.

I think the two or three months’ salary rule is wack. Focus on her style, make it meaningful, and have realistic expectations in mind. Unless you’re independently wealthy, have no student loan debt, and your bills pay themselves…spend what you can afford. Remember, you can always upgrade her ring once you’re rollin’ in the dough. 

Put the plan in action.

Gather what you need (don’t forget the ring) and propose.

So, super easy, right? Although I’m pretty in-tune with the male psyche (ha!), I asked for a little extra help on this one from my dude friends when it comes to proposal advice. Let me say, reading their responses to my questions was the absolute highlight of my week. Some responses were simple, a lot were hilarious, and all were heartfelt. Romance is definitely alive and well, my friends. Take some advice from guys who proposed and lived to tell the tale. After all, these fellas are batting a thousand.



Why did you pop the question when you did?

I popped the question when I did because we were dating for a year, but had 2 years working with each other. We had to build a lot of trust with each other to do our jobs professionally and that trust extended to our personal relationship. After we started dating, I knew she was the one. We were about to go on vacation and I popped the question before we went to the airport.
- Brandon P.
I popped the question because I knew she was the one for me when I first met her.
- David T.
I popped the question on 6/20/2010 which was the 2nd birthday party of Michele's son. I decided to do it that day because when I met Michele, I not only fell in love with her, but also fell in love with her son Immanuel, at the time he was not even a year old (9mo). My heart wanted to bring us all together as one family so it felt right to do it on his birthday party.
- Gian F.
I popped the question on Easter 2013 with her entire family over at our apartment for dinner. It was unique and unexpected because I told her from the beginning that proposals on holidays were cheesy. It was my way of ensuring she wouldn't see the proposal coming. It worked out perfectly and it was a day we will never forget.
- Mikal S.
Sam and I had been dating for a couple years and knew we loved each other, so the count down to a proposal was already on. I found myself in a situation where I needed to move from where we were living for work and I had always told myself I was never going to ask a girl to move for me without a ring on her finger; so that made the decision pretty easy.
- Seth A.
Proposing to Laura was a no-brainier for me, but the timing was interesting. We were a couple of years into our relationship and already nine months into living together. I knew she was the one. This was around the same time when I started my career as a dentist. I started saving for a ring since my first paycheck! After a few months I had enough money to buy the ring. Once I got it into my hands I started making all these plans on how I was going to do it. I said to myself "maybe in a few weeks I'll ask her parents and come up with a really nice plan to propose." Well about 36 hours into having the ring in my pocket I made a phone call to her parents. With their blessing, I popped the question near the lake in Kenosha. A park where we had our first date, which was kicking around a soccer ball near Kemper Center. Once that ring was in my pocket, there was no waiting, I couldn't wait to put it on her finger!
- Frank C.

How did you make your proposal special?

This made me laugh because my proposal... it was special to me, even though it wasn't "romantic" or well thought out... I didn't have a ring. I didn't know I was going to do it. I just felt it. Like I knew I didn't want to be with anyone else and I had to get it out right there, right then... lol in the backseat of my car. We were both in tears and I gave a long drawn out ramble as to why she was the only one for me. Traditional is not my style and I think she would agree it's not exactly her style either.
- Ben M.
I made the proposal special by using a fake gift certificate to a jewelry store. She had wanted a ring for a little while. So on the night I proposed I first have her the fake gift certificate telling her it was $100 gift certificate for a promise ring to rile her up. While she was reacting to the gift certificate I then got down on a knee and showed her the ring and asked her to marry me.
- Bill F.
Jenny knows I tend to do things in crazy ways, so I figured why not get arrested to make this proposal special?! A couple of police officers came into a diner we were at, asked if I was transporting a large substance, got me on my knees with hands behind my back, and pulled the ring out. It was definitely memorable!
- Brandon P.
It was special because I gathered all our closest friends and family in one place and brought her there.
- David T.
Aside from having it on her son's birthday party, being the goof that I am, I playfully proposed to her with a ring pop, I think this was more to calm my nerves more than anything, because you know it is a tiny bit serious. The whole ring pop deal wasn't even planned, on the way to the park I stopped over at a CVS and bought it along with whatever other items I needed to grab. I think the spontaneity of it all added a little flavor of uniqueness to the occasion.
- Gian F.
I took her on a weekend trip to downtown Chicago. I tried to make it a special day for her by taking her shopping all day long and set up reservations for a nice restaurant that evening. As she was getting ready for dinner I called her into the other room; I was down on one knee and the rest is history.
- Seth A.


If you could change one thing about your proposal, what would it be?

The officers were supposed to pull me outside so I wouldn't put Jenny on the spot in front of a bunch of people, because I think that's kind of tacky so I always wanted to change that part. In all honesty though it was great to have so many people come up to us and wish us the best while offering some advice based on their own experiences.
- Brandon P.
Honestly, probably not a whole lot. It wasn't a big production. It wasn't a big announcement that was broadcasted to the whole group of guest, it was around immediate family. It wasn't in private (cause you know the girl always wants people around to show off the ring to). Really, I would probably just add a video capture to the event, photos are not enough in these day and age, and almost seem outdated. Haha.
- Gian F.
Not sure if I would change much about the proposal if I didn't have to. It would have been nice to have been further removed from college so I had a little more money available.
- Seth A.


What is it about your girl that made you want to ask her to marry you?

She was my best friend and way hotter than all my guy friends so it just went hand-in-hand!
- Brandon P.
You really just have to listen to your heart. We have been friends since my sophomore year in high school. Although we did not date in high school, I still to this day remember all those feelings I had for her when we went everywhere together. A few years after college we reconnected and started dating and, not surprised at all, I still had those same feelings. After three years of being in a relationship, I asked her to marry me because I felt deep down that I was ready for that next step in my life and that I wanted her to be with me the rest of the way. I love how we can laugh at anything, she cares for me, and she can pick me up when things get down. I can go on and on but I think another important reason, at least for me, was getting along and fitting in with her family and friends as well as her getting along with mine. At the end of the day we just get along on so many levels. She is truly my best friend!
- Dan T.
Her personality and drive.
- David T.
Bruuhh she hot! Ok kidding aside! Well... while dating her and getting to know her family, I really appreciated that she shared the same values and also having the same cultural background doesn't hurt, makes our childhood easily relatable to some degree. Also, and probably the biggest thing was when I realized that it is innate to her that she was a nurturer. I felt secure knowing that my future, our kids’ future is in good hands and she will be there with that family first mentality.
Gian F.
Sam and I have very kindred spirits. We're very similar in a lot of ways and compliment each other in many others. It's those things and countless others that drew us together.
- Seth A.