How to Emily Post the Heck Out of Your Invitations

I’m kind of a stickler for etiquette and manners. You’re never going to catch me empty-handed at your party or months late on my thank you notes. Although I never expect this of anyone else (I’m still incredibly surprised when a thank you note shows up in my mail), I’m weirdly hard on myself about it.

Because of my Emily Post-like tendencies, I have wedding etiquette burned into my brain. It never fails that when a wedding invitation or save-the-date arrives in the mail, my husband asks me about it. Usually something like, “Whoa, they are sending this really late, right?” and half of the time my answer is yes.

It may seem ridiculous that save-the-dates and invitations have such far out deadlines, but it’s all about being considerate of your guests, their time, and their resources. It’s also about you and making sure the most important people in your life can make it to your wedding. How much would it suck if your favorite cousin can’t save up the airfare money to get to your wedding because you only gave her two months notice? I mean, she only works part-time at Chipotle for goodness sake…


Here’s some timing you should stick to when figuring out your invites:

6 to 12 Months – Send your Save-the-Date
Six months is the standard, but if you are planning a destination wedding or a popular date (like New Year’s Eve) you should send it out much earlier.

3 to 12 Months – Order your Invitations
If you are having your invitations custom made, you should start talking to your designer as soon as possible. Not only are they designing something for you, but they need to source any paper/folders/envelopes, and hire the printer or press before you even get your hands on the invitations to assemble and mail them.

If you are simply purchasing a fill in the blank invitation, just make sure you allow enough time for you to fill in those blanks, assemble, and mail them.

2 Months – Send your Invitations
Oh my gosh, you just sent out your wedding invitations! It’s official! Ahhhhhh!!

2 to 4 Weeks – RSVP Deadline
Don’t forget to include a deadline for those RSVPs. Checking the mail every day for those RSVPs feels like Christmas morning.

You’ll need to get those in at least two weeks before your wedding so you can give the final guest count to your vendors. Don’t be surprised if you have to call guests that haven’t RSVP’d or have guests change their RSVP at the last minute. But that’s all for another post…

1 to 2 Weeks After – Send your Thank Yous
Wait, you’ve been married for two weeks already?! Wow. Get working on those thank yous!



If you haven’t seen, Noir Event Co. is having a giveaway! Colette and I went on a bit of an Anthropologie shopping spree. That store is dangerous, you guys.

You can enter to win this box of delightful treats by liking our Facebook page and sharing any of our posts on Facebook or Instagram. You must include #noireventco in your post so we can find it! This box would make a perfect treat for you or a gorgeous gift for a loved one. The holidays are upon us, after all!

Contest ends Saturday, December 12th at 11:59pm. Each new share enters your name in the contest again. Winner will be randomly selected and announced on Sunday, December 13th at noon.